Somewhere between 9 and 10 a.m. on May 14, 2022 — a Saturday morning much like any other — my dad dropped dead in the kitchen of my childhood home.
All at once, my family had a funeral to fund and plan while my mom’s doctors figured out a treatment for stage four cancer. I had just returned to Maryland after 10 years in the Marine Corps. My dreams of crafting new family memories turned sour and spoiled instantly.
To make matters worse, the employment I had gained fired me just three months after starting — but my acceptance letter to Morgan State University was the ace up my sleeve.
More than 1,000 students walked across the stage during Morgan State University’s 148th spring commencement ceremony Saturday and during the fall ceremony in December .
And this time, I was among them.
I graduated with a bachelor’s degree in strategic communication nearly 20 years after graduating from high school.
My father did see me cross the stage; he didn’t cheer from the stands but I believe his spirit was right next to my mom, wedged between my brother and his wife — grinning from ear to ear.
His words urged me forward, “I’ll always be proud of you, Bit.” he would say.
I graduated from Oxon Hill High School’s science and technology program in 2006 and was accepted into my first-choice university: Pratt Institute.
My household income — which included my mother’s military pension and my father’s full-time labor — was just shy of $40,000 a year. Pratt — a prestigious, private art university nestled between the Fort Greene and Bedford-Stuyvesant neighborhoods in Brooklyn, New York — cost more than $40,000 a year including tuition, room and board, academic fees, and supplies. I saw it as my one shot to live my dream of becoming an animator and I pursued it.
Armed with a small scholarship, financial aid and several student loans, I funded my education until poor credit, my close association with poverty and the Great Recession prevented me from completing my final semester in spring 2011.
I was more than $60,000 in debt for a college degree I did not complete. I was functionally unemployable in my field of choice and bills to pay.
Both of my parents were prior service military: my mom was a retired Navy veteran and my father was a Vietnam Marine. I knew the military could grant the freedom and financial stability the 23-year-old me needed with the promise of a fully paid education.
I also wanted to be like my dad — to walk the same pavement, sing the same marching chants and traverse the same woods. On April 16, 2012, I enlisted as a public affairs specialist and went to recruit training in Parris Island, South Carolina.
When I completed recruit training, my mom, dad and Sunday school teacher found me in that huge formation and hugged me. We laughed, we cried and exclaimed for joy.
During my 10 years, I completed recruit training, combat training, basic public affairs specialist course, basic combat correspondence, corporals’ course, sergeants’ course and basic recruiters course. I was stationed in Okinawa, Japan, Marine Corps Air Station Miramar, California, and Orange County, California. I had boyfriends, eventually married and quickly divorced. I lived.
As my military career came to an end, I craved an environment I hadn’t experienced since leaving Prince George’s County: one that wouldn’t question my hair’s texture or appearance, my body shape or composition, remove me from a politically conservative and white environment, and be close to home. I applied to Maryland HBCUs exclusively and Morgan was my first choice.
My three years at Morgan have been the respite I needed. I focused on my studies, grew as a writer, tested my mettle and found different career paths to explore.
Sometimes I really want to see my dad. I miss him and I wish he could see me now — but it’s not my time yet. I have much more to do before death finds me.
It took me an additional 15 years to graduate but I’m here now. This marks the end of this journey through education but it is only the beginning of the work I will do.
Chadwick Boseman once quoted Erma Bombeck, a columnist and best-selling author from the 1960s until her death in 1996: “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything You gave me.”
In a similar way, my hope is that my fellow graduates and I use our talents in their entirety, every drop.
Congratulations to us all!
Lillian Stephens is a 2025 graduate of Morgan State University. She served as editor-in-chief of the MSU Spokesman in the 2024-25 academic year after serving as managing editor the previous year. She graduated summa cum laude.
